GEMMA ROSE

AN AWFULLY GAY ADVENTURE!

 

As I sit here in a hostel, somewhere in Pimlico, London, munching on perhaps my 112th Tesco meal deal this fortnight, now seems as good a time as any to reflect on my two weeks in the big smoke.

 

Sitting on the 9:17am train from Sheffield to London St Pancras to embark on my placement at DIVA magazine seems a lifetime ago, and to be quite honest, I was shitting myself. DIVA is the biggest lesbian and bisexual magazine in the country and yeah, I was initially worried because my own sexuality does not match the brand of the magazine. I remember Cathy saying in the last lecture before we left (for those of you who weren't listening) that magazine houses are like clubs. They like people who are like them. How was I going to fit in? And what if all I did for two weeks was staple bits of paper together, pretend to tidy my desk and make tea and coffee? I don't even know how to make tea and coffee. I despise them both equally.

 

Fortunately, my first day exceeded all my expectations. By lunchtime I already had my name on the website along with an article I wrote about the NUS campaign for equal marriage rights. The editorial team made me feel welcome and for the duration of my placement I sat on an island of computers in a bubble of lesbians, bisexuals, transgender people, sex, sex toys, STIs, sports and Christmas.

 

A lot of the articles I wrote will never be seen by my grandparents. Ever. And trying to think like a lesbian was exhausting. There was also Toby, the office pug who would pop up unannounced from under your desk as you were writing a hilarious joke about Alice in Wonderland bullet vibrators.

 

James, Andy and myself stayed in a Travel Joy hostel in South London. The pub was our living room, we were plied with egg and toast in a morning, the showers were shit (a mere trickle of water), there was Salsa night on a Wednesday, and trying to find your toothbrush in the dark is a ball ache. There was the drunken bang between Swedish blondie and Irish chav 2cm from my head. 

 

Or, how about the three sleepless nights we had because a man had the worst snore ever. It sounded like a farmer, his tractor, and the pigs were in the next bed. Despite this, I can honestly say, hand on heart that I do not think the London experience would have been quite the same without it all.

 

We filled time after work with upteen rounds of 'Would you rather...?' which included an awful lot of blue cheese. "Would you rather be 'tarmaced' or eat blue cheese for the rest of your life?" was a personal highlight, or "would you rather have blue cheese pumped into your body constantly for a week, or eat cream of mushroom soup for the rest of your life?" Andy was quick to point out that you would drown in blue cheese, but James reminded us that there is always a medic on hand. Of course, how could we forget?

 

When we weren't indulging in iPad apps and pub banter, we did make it out the hostel. Pizza Express for dinner on the first night was a barrel of laughs, although 95% of our conversation can never be repeated. A casual trip to M&M World entertained me for about 20 minutes, lunch in Camden market with Sarah was always a day-brightener, and Covent Garden is a little slice of Europe in the middle of London.

 

If I wasn't working, I took it upon myself to be as touristy as I could; the Imperial War Museum (to release my inner history nerd), the Natural History museum (I only went to see the big dinosaur and then left promptly when it was £5.20 for a cheese and ham sandwich), and then a walk to Hyde Park to visit the Winter Wonderland Christmas market.

 

Seeing your work out there is certainly the most rewarding thing. For the last few months, before I came to DIVA, I had lost my passion for writing. I never got that writer's urge and only wrote when university required it. My love for journalism has been reignited, which if anything is the best thing to come out of this experience.

 

Tonight is our last night in the capital and we intend to get well and truly on it.

 

Merry Christmas! And London, it has been a pleasure.

 

To read some of my published work, click here